I was thinking to myself: what kind of person becomes an MP (Military Police)? It has to be someone that wants to join the Marine Corps, but also just kind of doesn’t actually like Marines. There’s a dubious double standard for MP’s in terms of perception amongst the average populace. On one hand, Marines do stupid shit and the base needs a police force like any other town. On the other, being an MP automatically makes you a blue falcon since you kind of have to be the guy that gets Marines in trouble every day. There’s really no winning here.

Of course, the MP field is pretty big, not all of them are pulling you over for going 30 in a 25 zone on base (the whole base, really). In all honestly I would consider being an MP if I knew I could be a dog handler, because that’s a fucking awesome job. I remember traveling with a dog handler and his dog during my 2nd deployment to Iraq from al Asad to COP Heider up on the Syrian border. I recall looking at them with immense jealousy, because I wished I could hang out with a dog all day.

My only other real experience with MP’s was when I got pulled over once on base, but it was totally my fault. There’s a stretch on MCBH Kaneohe Bay that goes into the base housing area, the speed limit is 25 MPH but it’s just one long straight away. Of course, I took a liberty with this and was doing something like 37 down the straightaway, not realizing there was an MP behind me. He pulled my dumb ass over and gave me a warning since it was my first offense, which I am grateful for since I obviously knew I was speeding.

In any case, I’m not one of those idiots that decries the police in a general sense. In my general experience, people that have a problem with police are people that often do stupid shit. Here’s an idea: maybe you wouldn’t have a problem with cops busting your shit if you didn’t do dumb shit worth busting you over.

“We live in a police state!”

No we don’t, you’re just a fucking ass.